When someone is waiting at the office, is it appropriate to give a gift to the baby? What if you haven’t been invited to the shower yet?
Dear Cheryl,
One of our co-workers is expecting, and invited a staff member to her baby shower.
My coworker who was invited collected money from the rest of us to give to the baby shower. I mentioned that it didn’t seem right, but contributed anyway.
Do you think it is appropriate for my co-worker to request a monetary gift from us who was NOT invited to the baby shower?
thanks,
Julia
Hi Julia,
You are correct; it is not appropriate to ask someone to contribute to a baby shower gift if they are not invited to the shower.
Workplace gifts can be confusing and stressful. The person collecting the money should do some research, although he probably has the best intentions. From an etiquette standpoint, your coworker who was invited to the shower should attend, buy her own gift and not mention it at work. He didn’t think that the mom-to-be might be embarrassed when he opened a group gift at the shower, knowing that the others weren’t invited.
It’s better to collect a group gift from everyone in the office and give it to the mother-to-be at a later time, keeping the personal baby shower celebration separate from the workplace celebration.
However, the mother-to-be is not the one doing the collecting, and she probably doesn’t know anything about it. On the bright side, now you’re covered and don’t have to worry about a collection or buying a baby gift later.
If you have questions or comments about this post or gift giving, bridal shower, baby shower, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email [email protected]
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