Being a new parent is stressful in its own right, but adding social anxiety to the mix can make you feel overwhelmed.
As a parent, you can’t avoid experiences like going to the doctor or seeing relatives. Fortunately, there are many ways to manage anxiety while navigating the ins and outs of motherhood.
Can I be a good mother if I have social anxiety?
The short answer: yes. You are an incredible mother, social anxiety or not.
Some new mothers may feel overwhelmed or nervous in social situationsbut many are just suffering from stress caused by sseizure of leep or a packed schedule.
Between night feedings, diaper changes, and home management, it may be difficult to breathe — eight solid hours less sleep.
At the same time, your body probably looks and feels different, leaving you anxious about your identity. You get used to doing everything with a baby by your side.
Married already the high expectations people have of new mothersand fully understand why you feel overwhelmed or have low self-esteem.
Some new mothers also suffer from a social anxiety disorder. About 7% of people have this condition and experience great stress in daily interactions, so if that sounds like you, you’re not alone.
The good news is that no matter how overwhelming your anxiety feels, you can manage it.
Common anxiety-inducing events and how to deal with them
Ready to face your social jitters? Here’s how to handle situations that may cause you anxiety.
1. Children’s birthdays
Birthday parties definitely involve talking to other parents. You may feel pressured to be seen as together, happy and comfortable when you feel something but.
You may also compare yourself to other parents and feel like you don’t measure up.
However, it is important to remember that a birthday party is much more about making children happy rather than meeting people. Other parents don’t expect you to be perfect, and Being shy or unsure of yourself around new people is OK.
Remember — people invited you to the party because they liked you!
Introduce yourself to some new people and get their contact information. If you want to make a good impression, offer to help clean up while the party takes a breather.
2. Going to the movies
Going to the movies can feel stressful because of this involves leaving your baby at home — perhaps for the first time — and being close to crowds of people. You also can’t answer potentially important phone calls from your partner because your phone is off.
However, keep that in mind a movie only takes a few hours. The likelihood of something terrible happening at that time is minimal. You can too left the theater for a few minutes if you need a breather.
Grabbing a snack or using the bathroom in the middle of a movie is socially acceptable, so don’t worry about what other people think.
3. Flying
Around 25 million US adultss fear of flying, and it’s no wonder why. Just navigating a crowded airport can provoke social anxiety.
If you have a newborn, you can add finding a place to nurse, clean up spit up, and racing to catch your flight while pushing a stroller on the list of reasons why air travel is the worst. Once on board, you can worry about keeping your baby quiet and comfortable.
It can help with study the airport map so you can easily find food, a bathroom, and a quiet place to nurse when you arrive.
On your flight, remember crying babies and airplanes in unison — people expect to hear the noise of children in their flight. That’s why everyone wears headphones!
You are doing nothing wrong; your baby may be uncomfortable with air pressure and loud noises.
Bring a cozy blanket and pillow to help you settle in with your baby. Change their diaper before takeoff to reduce the chances you’ll need to do it onboard.
If you need to use the bathroom, carry your baby in a body sling. You can also leave your baby in the carrier and ask a flight attendant to look after them for you.
4. Family reunification
Large social gatherings can cause anxiety in many people. If you just had a baby, you might feel like the spotlight is on you because everyone wants to meet your little bundle of joy.
Even among family members, this is normal and it’s healthy to set boundaries about holding your babyfeeding them, or anything else that bothers you personally.
It’s better if you rest during the event. Walk around the block or sit in your car for a few minutes from the festivities. Once you catch your breath, you can return the recharged.
5. Girls night
You are a rare exception if you have kept your house perfectly clean after giving birth. Your friends won’t expect your home to look perfect — they want to be with you.
Even with the dishes in the sink, a pile of nursing blankets on the couch, and a week’s worth of unopened bills are on the coffee table, you can still host a girls’ night in.
Alternatively, you can have your partner or a babysitter take your baby for a few hours and have a girls’ night out. Don’t worry if your usual clothes don’t fit or you don’t like drinking as expected. This is your chance kick back, relax and get your nails done while binging rom-coms with your besties. You deserve that.
Remember to take care of yourself (this will help reduce anxiety)
When you start feeling overwhelmed, look at your life as a whole. How was your sleep? Do you eat several small, balanced meals throughout the day?
If you’re a new mom, you can it’s hard to prioritize your health. But remember that taking care of your baby starts with taking care of yourself. You may need to slow down and address your physical and mental health first — even if your newborn’s crying sounds like an emergency.
Some of the most important areas to prioritize are eating right, getting enough sleep, drinking plenty of water, exercising, and bathing. Cutting back on substances that can make your anxiety worse, in the long run, is also a good idea.
If you think medication could help you, talk to a doctor to see which types are safe when pregnant or breastfeeding. Medicine can’t do all the work for you, but it can be part of your healing journey.
Additional tips for managing social anxiety
Here are some more ways to manage your anxiety:
- Stay up to date with current events so you can speak easily.
- Deep breathing, journaling, and meditation can help you learn to feel grounded.
- Prepare for events, but don’t over-prepare. Find out when they are happening and where.
- Instead of completely rejecting social events, see if your partner can come along to help you with your baby. You can handle stressful situations as a team.
- Practice being a good listener and asking open-ended questions so people can get to know you better.
Final words of advice: you’ve earned it
Just like you can’t get rid of sadness or anger, you can’t get rid of anxiety — nor should it. However, you can manage it so it doesn’t control your life.
While being a new mom can be scary, it’s also a fun and rewarding experience — especially when your mental health is stable. You will overcome social anxiety to live your life to the fullest.
