Started with my favorite NE Portland Couple…. I’ll never forget the looks and stares I got the first day I tried to squeeze in something big BOB stroller at the door of a fancy four-table café. Next, this is our favorite sushi restaurant where my husband and I spent many evenings laughing and talking to the staff – they weren’t interested in us putting a car seat with a sleeping newborn between us because this means less room at the sushi bar for other patrons. And even when I try to take a class at my favorite yoga studio it seems out of reach, because most classes don’t allow me to bring my cute friend. Despite feeling the sting of rejection from some of my most coveted spots, I’m determined to find new places that welcome me AND my baby.
My longing to find third places as a parent was not in vain – having a destination in mind helped break up the repetitive, mundane hours of raising a newborn. In addition, having a goal for the day helped relieve anxiety and stress and offered interaction with my peers. The evidence shows that regular access to third places is associated with better health and happiness. Unlike home and work, third places are spaces where people can escape the expectation of getting things done and focus on interacting with others. People can exchange ideas, views, and beliefs, or simply experience “solitude without loneliness.” In addition, third places are important to democracy and to the health and vitality of a city. Upon reflection, I now see that it wasn’t my pre-parenthood third place fault, it was that I had evolved. My needs have changed, and I need a space and community that understands that.
Finding a Parent-Friendly Place
In my postpartum fog, I almost forgot about a place where I took a lactation class, a wellness center that caters to prenatal people and families with young children. This space has a lot to offer new parents – so I decided to attend a breastfeeding support group despite feeling successful in our nursing experience. I was able to bring my baby, there were clean changing stations in the bathrooms, extra diapers on hand – and most of all, friendly faces that met my eyes when I walked in with a screaming baby instead of looking far. I immediately reached out to a fellow parent and from there went on a quest to discover our own third parent-friendly place. We compared notes on which cafes have play spaces for kids, which restaurants have fast service and patient servers, and which movement classes allow our little sidekicks to join. It’s fun exploring the city to find our new third places.
The thought of such a quest, today, in a post-pandemic world seems terrifying.
After COVID, many of us combined our first two places, work and home, into the same space. Services such as Instacart, Amazon and DoorDash That means, we hardly ever leave the house. However, the need to connect with others is in all of us. So how do we find community – our third places – without having to travel far?
Postpartum doulas and lactation consultants are experts in helping new families find connection – whether by providing companionship during the day or overnight doula visits, or connections to a long line of parents who have worked hard to build a positive feeding relationship with their children. As postpartum professionals, we also keep an eye out for many opportunities for parents to find their third places – we’re happy to share our short list of parent-friendly places in PDX and the surrounding area.
Favorite Places for New Parents and Toddlers
Circle of Care for Growing Families
Struggling to leave home, but still looking to connect with other parents? Join our virtual parent support group, the Nurturing Circle hosted by Bridgetown Baby postpartum doula and newborn expert, Britta Johnson. Each Tuesdays from 10:30am-12pm on Zoom, free of charge. Click here to join from the comfort of home – or anywhere else!
New, this fall! The in-person SE Nurturing Circle at Sellwood Community House: Monday, 9am-10:30am.
Bridgetown Baby Classes and Other Support Groups
Everything seems easier with some knowledge to anchor and supplement your own budding parenting, and the hard stuff is easier to get over when you have a community of support. We offer several options in addition to Circle of Care.
Resolve Support Group for Infertility and Alternative Family Planning
Virtual Newborn Feeding Basics Class
Virtual Newborn Care 101 Class
In house Personalized Newborn Care Essentials Class
In house Twins 101 Class for parents expecting multiples
Personalized Partner Package to recognize and teach about the unique roles of couples
Ready Set Grow
The only yoga studio in Portland, OR dedicated to families and those looking to grow their families. With tons of classes to choose from such as yoga, movement, lactation, birth education and newborn 101, Ready Set Grow has something for every parent or parent. To find the perfect class for you check it out here.
Sellwood Community House
A warm, welcoming and accessible place for all people of all ages, abilities and identities. We love that Sellwood Community House provides programming for infants through senior citizens. This community-centered area has toddler playgroups, children’s tumbling classes, a preschool, youth offerings and more. SCH is perfect for families with children of different ages. To find the right fit for your family click here.
Beech Street Parenting
Becoming a parent is a big change – for you and your baby. Beech Street Parenting is here to guide you on your way, using RIE-inspired principles of respectful parenting. Discover virtual and in-person classes for you and your family here.
Book Babies at Multnomah County Libraries
Babies from birth to 12 months (with a favorite adult) enjoy songs, action rhymes and playtime and share a book together at each lively Book Babies session. Book Babies gives your baby the opportunity to hear many languages while you meet other new families. Find story time at a local library nearby you.
Luna Wellness
Meet the experts in prenatal and postpartum self-care. Luna wellness has many offerings to choose from, including massage, acupuncture, and chiropractic treatments. Best of all, Luna supports care for both children and parents. Luna understands how difficult it is to find time for yourself as a new parent and provides childcare at specific times of the day. See all of Luna’s practitioner visits and offerings here.
McMennamins Kennedy School – Mommy Matinee
The Kennedy School Theater hosts Mommy Matinee every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday afternoon/early evening. You can relax on their non-traditional loveseats and arm chairs with a slice of pizza, a beer or any other item from their restaurant menu. The term Mommy Matinee implies that young children are likely to accompany the parents, so crying and babbling can be expected rather than avoided. Tickets are heavily discounted to boot, as most movies are later showings of popular movies that were released months ago. See what’s playing here.
Playgroups and Other Resources
Map of Portland, Oregon swap and play locations
Pilea Play (SW Portland)
City Play for Kids (Vancouver)
Find your Postpartum Village
As we say, people are not meant to walk the path of parenthood alone. Finding guidance that will strengthen your instincts and build your confidence is a good start. From there, you have a great springboard for going out, meeting other parents, and building the community that makes parenting that much sweeter.
