When people ask what I do for work these days, my answer is simple: I’m a mom. A 24/7, stay-at-home (but not really stay-put-at-home), tired, exhausted, and — most of all — grateful mother That about sums it up. Of course, once, in what feels like a lifetime ago (but not really that long ago), I became a teacher. A teacher of young hearts and minds, as I often say. But now, being a mother is consuming me.
Shortly after finding out I was expecting my firstborn, I made plans to turn in my classroom keys and, at least for a moment, close the door on one beloved chapter for the sake of the next. I put my career on hold, and I have no regrets about my decision.
being a mother Oh My Job Now
At this particular stage of life, I am focused on raising my children. I’m not sure what the future holds for my career. And I’m fine. In fact, I wouldn’t have it any other way. As much as I wish these short years were something I could put on pause, they just were is not. They’re only here for a short time, and they’re not coming back when they’re gone. And you know? That bitter truth breaks my heart more every time I stop and think about it.
Now, I’m not here to say anything negative about the countless (and, I might add, incredible) moms on the other end of the spectrum. The ones who go full throttle in their careers, while also raising little people. That’s their journey, and I applaud it! For me? being a mother is my whole journey today. . . and that’s something I don’t take lightly. Putting a traditional career on hold to raise babies is definitely not for everyone (or even possible for everyone, I know), but it was the right fit for me. I will teach my children, take care of my children, and be there for my children 24/7 . . . and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. This is is my most important work, and I am happy in the position I am in.
I Don’t Let Myself Worry About The Future
I could sit here and think about how I can get back into the workforce one day — you know, when these too-short, “little” years are long gone — but I choose not to. Instead, I soaked in what I was do have: borrow time from my favorite people in the world. Long days made up of little moments that will soon become cherished (albeit sometimes hazy, I’m sure) memories. Even longer nights full of cuddling, comforting, and caring for all I love: my babies. My wide-eyed, imaginative, growing-too-fast babies.
And while I don’t receive any fancy promotions for the endless hours I clock, I get more than any position outside of the one I’m filling right now could offer me. That means I get the gift of time. Being a mom and watching my once tiny babies grow into proud toddlers ready to take on the world made me realize how short life is, and I definitely soaked it all up. There’s no time to worry about the future when the beautiful, exhausting, blink-and-it’s-gone present is so short.
I’m Still Here — And I’m Still Growing
People often talk about how easy it is for women to lose themselves in their motherhood. While I couldn’t help but say goodbye to parts of my old self in the process, becoming a mother (and walking away from the life – career and all – that I knew then) introduced me to a whole new sense of self. In the meantime, motherhood is my identity My job. My 9-5. . . and every hour before and after.
While that might make it seem like I’m losing myself here, the truth is quite the opposite. In fact, with full-time motherhood as my job at this stage of life, I found myself. My new and improved self, my strongest self, my ever-evolving “I’ve waited forever for this” self. I have never felt more at peace in any position than I do mother, and I knew I was in the right place. I’m still here. Still me. And I’m still growing.
My Career Is Paused, But My Job Is Not
As a stay-at-home mom to a 1.5-year-old and a new 3-year-old, my career is the last thing on my mind right now. That does not mean that I have stopped. Instead, I just shift my focus and give everything to my babies. These people are short. Even though it breaks my heart to say it, I know I will never go back to them. My career may be on pause for this chapter of life, but my work has never been more important. And that is something I will never look back on and regret.
